Monday, October 30, 2017

MEMORABLE DATES



We all experience memorable events in our lives – happy or sad – and when those are coupled with holidays, the dates stick with us. For instance, just one year ago on Halloween, my sister Harriet suddenly passed away as she went about her day (here). I know I’m not the only one remembering that today. But though I’ll never forget that Harriet passed away on Halloween, life goes on and I won’t be forever sad. After all, Grandma and Grandpa Portfors were married on Halloween in 1906, and I happily call that date to mind any time I need it, even though it was way before my time and they’ve both been gone for years. For that matter, my Dobson grandparents were married on Christmas Day in 1891.

Grandpa Portfors passed away on Christmas Eve, 1971. Yes, that was a memorable Christmas indeed. My mother took it hard even though Grandpa had been in ill health for years. It was just that she gave her all in preparing for Christmas but was totally unprepared for his passing. All that is associated with Christmas in my mind, but when Christmas comes this year, I’ll focus on the matter at hand and won’t even think about that year when Grandpa died. I never do.

I feel the same way about my dad’s passing. I will always remember that he left the day after Thanksgiving in 1987, but I don’t remember the specific date without checking records. And my mother passed in March – the 7th? – a date that is otherwise meaningless to me, and I never think about it. In a world that seems to love recurring annual celebrations, not every date needs to be indelibly set in memory and re-lived. Thank goodness! KW

[The scan is a place card on which "Francis" is written in my mother's hand. (Francis was familiarly known as "Porkie.") On the back is written: "20th wedding anniversary -- Mom and Pop, 10-31-26; chicken at Oud's." Evidently a celebratory dinner was served at the John Oud home in honor of C. O. and Nina Portfors, my grandparents, who married on Halloween in 1906. The owl appears to be a sticker. Back in the day, place cards were frequently used to assign one's place at the table.]

1 comment:

Chris said...

Hmm, amazing that both our fathers passed the day after Thanksgiving. Yes, there are certain dates that create echoes each year. Some, happening when I was quite young, just come to mind during the month as the date is gone, but others, especially birthdays, seem poignant on the actual date.