Saturday, May 23, 2020

MEMORIAL DAY ALREADY?


A view from the Gilbert (Idaho) Cemetery (2013)
Memorial Day snuck up on me. How did we get here? May has almost evaporated. What happened to April? Wasn’t it just March?

Sister Joni and I reminisced the other day about the Memorial Day activities our extended family used to enjoy. Through the organization of our Mother, it was a family tradition to leave bouquets at the graves of ancestors and loved ones in four or five regional cemeteries. It was wonderful in the ‘50s and ‘60s, but times change. We no longer have the plethora of spring flowers at our disposal or the inclination to travel the circuitous route to the various cemeteries. And – we no longer have mother.

Nellie stands beside my dad's grave at Gilbert (2013)
Joni lamented that she would like to buy flowers, probably planters, for the graves of her husband and son, but she’s maintaining a low profile during the pandemic and doesn’t want to shop the marts. Besides, the planters have become expensive. She said in past years she’s taken her planters on Memorial Day Friday and removed them Monday evening. To leave them longer is to risk theft, even from the country cemetery.

These “Decoration Day” visitations were so important to our mother and our grandparents that we experience some guilt in not doing it, but I reminded Joni that it’s simply a remembrance, and if we can’t do it, it really doesn’t matter. Mother knew it didn’t matter, too. She just liked to do it. KW

2 comments:

Chris said...

Dan and I were talking about this this morning, how it used to be called Decoration Day as well as Memorial Day. We, too, took flowers around to family graves. Ole Beeson had given me some Iris bulbs which we planted at the front edge of our garden lot. Those bulbs gave us flowers for many, many years.

Kathy said...

In discussion with Milo, I provided a little history, a combo of what I read online and what I remembered:
Memorial Day, first called Decoration Day, was established after the Civil War to honor fallen soldiers. Until 1970, when the government went to 3-day holidays, Memorial Day was May 30. None of this 3 day stuff. We went to the cemeteries on Memorial Day along with everyone else. We might do Orofino and Gilbert the night before. On Memorial Day, we got up early, picked flowers, loaded the car, and went to Troy. Then we went on to Lewiston. And if you missed it, there was no point in doing it late. You wanted your flowers there ON Memorial Day.

From my perspective, these cemetery visits helped to make my ancestors warm to me. I heard who they were and a little about them. One year Aunt Hattie told me what a fine woman her mother-in-law (my great-great-grandmother) was.

How nice that Ole gave you iris bulbs for your garden. Iris is usually available for Memorial Day bouquets.